14 ЗАПОВЕДЕЙ ЭМОЦИОНАЛЬНОЙ ЗАЩИТЫ.

1.Не стесняйтесь открыто высказывать свое мнение, выражать эмоции. Терзаца и протестовать в душе, сохраняя невозмутимый вид,вредно для здоровья. « Никто не властин в своих мнениях и привязанностях, но всякий должен быть господином их изъявлений», — справедливо утверждал тонкий знаток человеческой натуры Пьер Буаст.

2. Мечите стрелы гнева. Выйдя из себя, древни римляни, по заведенному в то время, обычно били горшки, специально приготовленные, чтобы попасть под горячую руку, а античные греки упражнялись в стрельбе из лука. Повести на стене  что-то не приятное и пускайте в него «стрелы гнева»  - это поможет сбросить нервное напряжение. Не плохая идея для тех, у кого есть чувство юмора, «лист возмущения». Напишите на нем: «скромность  в минуту  крайнего негодования» и прикрепите к стене над столом.

3. Мыслети позитивно. Думайте о том, чего у вас нет. Не переживайте из-за потерянных вещей или напрасно потраченного времени. Есть утверждение: откуда сколько убыло, столько же туда и прибудет. Исповедующие эту жизненную философию не страдают от нервного напряжения.

4. Осознайте приделы своих возможностей. Чаще других от стресса страдают максималисты, стремящиеся к совершенству во всем, готовые принести жертвы ради успеха, болезненно переживающие неудачи. Хотя без них еще никому не удалось прожить. Работайте в меру собственных сил, радуйтесь делу своих рук, признайте за собой право на ошибку и не гонитесь за миражами.

Для закрепления психотерапевтического эффекта 3 раза в день повторяйте в слух высказывание английского поэта Томаса Элиота: «Стремление к совершенству – признак незначительности, ибо это свидетельство того, что мы признаем над собой не прирекаемый авторитет, которому пытаемся подчинится».

5. Не сторайтесь сохранить со всеми  хорошие отношения. Чем сильнее вы зависите от мнения окружающих и менее уверены в себе, тем более уязвимы психологически. Подбадривайте свое внутреннее «я» словами Пушкина « Ты сам свой высший суд». Не напрашивайтесь на чужое одобрение – будет меньше поводов для стресса.

6. Не пытайтесь убедить окружающих в своей правоте, даже если абсолютно уверены в ней. Леонардо да Винчи лодразделял  людей на 3 категории. Одни видят тоже самое, что и вы: с ними легко найти общий язык. Вторые способны увидеть картину в истенном свете, когда им покажешь: с такими, по крайней мере можно вести диалог. Третьи смотрят во все глаза и ничего не видят: доказывать им свою правоту все равно, что обучать  слепого спектральному анализу!

7. Научитесь реально оценивать себя и окружающих. У американских психотерапевтов есть один профессиональный анегдот.

Пациента спрашивают: «Кто вы?» Шизофреник, не задумываясь говори: «Я Авраам Линкольн». Задавленный стрессом невротик говорит: «Я хотел бы стать президентом, но не могу – денег нет, всем заправляют олигархи». Нормальный человек рассуждает так: «Я – это я, Авраам Линкольн – это Авраам Линкольн. У меня свои проблемы, у него свои. Я занимаюсь своим делом, он своим». Умейте ценить что имеете: в этом главная мудрость жизни и единственный способ поддержать внутреннюю гармонию, без которой не приходится мечтать о крепком здоровье.

8. Конструктивный взгляд на вещи. «Людей расстраивают не события, а то, как они на них смотрят», утверждал древнегречиский философ Эиктет. Помните страдание лисы из басни Крылова? Как только рыжая решила для себя, что недоступный виноград зелен и незрел, травмирующая ситуация рассосалась сама собой. Поступайте также, когда не удается получить то, что хотите.

9. Не обижайтесь на весь мир. Действуйте в соответствии с высказыванием Сократа: «Мои враги могут меня убить, но оскорбить не в состоянии» Постарайтесь перевести обиду с языка эмоций на язык логики. Проговорите проблему самому себе вслух, поделитесь с близким человеком или запишите на бумаге. Ваша цель – понять, почему случившиеся задело ваши чувства. Не затевайте разборку с обидчиком сразу. Скажите себе, как героиня романа «Унесенная ветром». «Я подумаю об этом завтра». Во всем, что касается отрицательных эмоций, утро действительно мудрее вечера.

10. Не скупитесь на улыбки. В организме все взаимосвязано –чуть чуть приподнять уголки губ и в головной мозг поступает рефлекторный сигнал: жить здорово! После этого места для стресса не остается. Недаром Виктор Гюго в присушем ему  романтическом духе сравнивал улыбку с солнцем, которое прогоняет зиму с человеческого лица. Сделайте антистрессовое упражнение: закройте глаза и растягивайте губы в улыбке 5 – 10 минут, повторяя магическую фразу «Все будет хорошо!». В правду будет – это проверено!

11. Плачте на здоровье . Ученые обнаружили: слезы – лучшая профилактика и надежное лекарство от мучений. Мальчики, которым с детства внушали, что плакать стыдно и не по мужски, повзрослев, страдают тяжелыми приступами так называемой пучковой головной боли. Но ее не бывает у женщин: им не восбронялось изредка всплакнуть над своей судьбой. Вы не в состоянии выдавить из себя ни слезинки? В этом случаи кричите как можно громче и пронзительней, пока не сбросите накопившееся напряжение. Громоподобный мужской крик – не средство устрашения, а всего лишь психологическая альтернатива тихим женским слезам.

12. Раньше вставайте по утрам. Дефицит драгоценного времени, из-за которого вы нервничаете, собираясь на работу, активизирует в головном мозге программу стресса. Достаточно перевести стрелку будильника на 10 – 15 минут вперед и хорошее самочувствие в течении дня будет обеспечено. «Кто рано лег спать и рано встал утром, тот будет здоровым, богатым и мудрым», — считал отец американской нации Бенжамин Франклин.

13.Прислушайся к себе. Черная полоса – прекрасный повод  делать то, что хочется. Посмотрите старый фильм – он воскресит приятные воспоминания. Возможно, вы давно мечтали освоить какое – то занятие – вышивать бисером, вязать крючком, говорить на иностранном языке, водить автомобиль, собирались сходить в бассейн или записаться фитнесс – клуб, но все не было времени. Скажите себе: «Сейчас или никогда!» Купите новое платье, смените духи, сделайте сногшибательную стрижку – словом, почаще устраивайте себе маленькие праздники – вы этого заслуживаете. Наконец, просто займитесь уборкой. Беспорядок и не уют в доме удивительным образом прокрадываются в мысли и настроение.

14. Стремитесь к одиночеству. Ежедневно выкраивайте хотя бы полчаса, чтобы побыть с собой  наедине. Жители крупных городов, а в особенности те, кто теснится в коммуналках  и «малогобаритках», часто страдают от нервного напряжения, причина которого – в избытки общения и дефиците личного пространства. При желании местечко для короткой беседы с самим собой всегда можно выкроить, прогуляйтесь в тихом переулке, уложив домочадцев спать, посидите за чашкой чая на кухне, примите ванну…….

 

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